A few reminders about dating by the Dating Guru
After experiencing one failure after another when I was dating as a young man, I feel obligated to tell you young people the valuable lessons I have learned so you won’t repeat my mistakes. I earned the title “dating guru” not because of my success on the dating scene, but from my failures. My dating disasters somehow made me wiser, and if I had the opportunity to do it again, God forbid, I would surely do it entirely differently. Anyway, take heed to what the ole wise dating guru has to say to you.
1. “House and wealth are inherited from parents, but a prudent wife is from the Lord.” Proverbs 19:14
2. Waiting creates yearning and the longer you wait, the sweeter the fruition of your romance will be.
3. It takes will power to love, but the more will power it takes for you to love someone, the shorter it will last, so never force a romance to take place if it isn’t meant to occur. No one can force a rose to bloom. It should happen naturally.
4. Do not fall in love with love. This is something that you encounter in comedy of manners. They are comical and laughable and always end up bad. Don’t trust your emotions at the moment when soft music is playing and candles are burning. Don’t be fooled by moonlight and the tender gaze of the one who happens to be walking next to you.
5. You can’t be truly happy with someone else if you can’t be content being by yourself. Insecurity and low self-esteem have ruined many relationships.
6. Make yourself into someone to whom you would like to be married and be in the places where the girls or guys you like to be with are. You know where nerds are if such people are the objects of your affections. Hey, nerds are indeed quite loveable and actually have something to say about different issues besides sports. You better become a spiritual person if you desire a Godly woman or man as a spouse.
7. A little prayer for your future spouse doesn’t hurt. A good wife, or husband, can make your home so heavenly and life so much more enjoyable. Believe me; I am speaking from my personal experience.
8. Be yourself all the time, but before you can truly be yourself before men, you need to spend time cultivating yourself by putting all the goodies into your own life in private. Keep your body in good shape by exercise and your spirit in top form by practicing godliness and charity. Nothing hurts your self-esteem more than filth in languages and actions. Not many people will like you if you loathe yourself.
9. Outward appearance is overrated. The ones who choose future mates on the bases of physical beauty should be avoided at all cost. You need to choose someone who will become more and more beautiful, or handsome, as years go be, not the opposite.
Well, this piece somehow turned out to be more didactical than I had expected and is loaded with cliché. A preacher can’t really hide himself behind the skin of a guru. My apology and a backbreaking Japanese bow. Ouch!
7 comments:
I'm confused. Should I wait for the right one to come along, or should I actively pursue them by showing up at church singles events and Aggie happy hours? Help me Guru!!
But I love outward appearance. God made woman curvy and babe-like for a purpose, right?
hmm comment deleted. I never thought this blog would deteriorate into gestapo style scare tactics.
the guru is really leaving me hanging here
I may hate myself, but it has nothing to do with me being filthy!!!
the count read point #3 right when he needed to hear it most
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, therefore there is no universal standard of judging what beauty is. Obviously there are objective criteria for judging espoused by some people, but they are fleeting and unreliable at best. For instance, I am not considered good-looking as a Chinese by any stretch of the imagination, but my wife doesn’t seem to agree with most of my countrymen’s judgment and deemed me good-looking enough for her. Come on, Justin, give it ten years or so, and gravity will do its damage, all the curves will be sagging and the firm will turn flabby. What will you do then? Divorce? Make sure you choose someone who will become more and more beautiful (not curvier, mind you) as the years go by. True beauty is inside-out, not outside in. The guru is quite sure that he is right on this.
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